I recently wrote about going easy on yourself and negative reinforcement. I’d like to continue with my habit of exploring things over more than one post. The reasons I do this are twofold, firstly it enables me to develop a subject over more time. Secondly, it allows me to correct myself, if needed, after thought in a what I feel is a more natural manner.
In this entry, I want to think aloud about other people’s criticism. We get criticised quite often, be it at work, at home even on the web. Heck I caught some in my first 6 months for daring to make post a on Evolution! The question is how to view criticism without it being destructive, one thing I’ve learned it that it takes two to party. We have to remember that the criticism is just a viewpoint, whether we accept it or not is up to us, we are allowed to think critically about criticism.
Also, who exactly is being criticised? The person who earned the criticism no longer exists and the person being criticised has moved on from there, so it’s a little easier to be objective about it. From a Buddhist viewpoint it’s not you that’s being criticised, it’s an action, a word, a view, or whatever but none of these things are the ever changing you. Even so you have incoming negativity….. Or do you?
We’re conditioned to think of criticism as an attack on the self, we react defensively to protect our “self”. But we have the option to revise that, to essentially redefine how we think of criticism, we can change the rules which can be a very subversive thing to do.
Interesting thought, yes?
Angela says:
Indeed. Been having similar thoughts lately as I plan a visit with my mother. Ha! But I also catch myself being like her, so it is work, both ways. Thanks for the introspection.
21 May 2007, 11:54 pm